“He Saw Me First”

A reflection on emotional uncertainty and unseen healing (John 9:1–7)

There are days I don’t know what I’m carrying.
Sadness moves through me like a quiet shadow—
not loud enough to scream,
but steady enough to keep me still.

I feel the weight of other people’s pain.
I see brokenness on faces I don’t know.
And sometimes, I feel blind to my own path.
No clarity, no direction. Just motion… and questions.

This morning, I thought about the man in John 9.
Blind from birth. Sitting in silence.
Not asking for help. Not expecting anything new.
And still…
Jesus saw him.

Jesus didn’t wait for him to cry out.
Didn’t need his permission to care.
He just stopped,
touched the dirt,
and began the healing work—
because the man’s condition wasn’t punishment.
It was purpose.

I wonder if that’s what today is for me.
Maybe this heaviness isn’t meant to be figured out.
Maybe it’s just the soil—the space—where God
puts His hands in my uncertainty
and begins to form something I don’t yet see.

Jesus didn't explain. He just acted.
He didn't ask for understanding. He gave vision.
The man didn’t know who was in front of him—
but healing had already begun.

So today, I remind myself:

I don’t have to know why I feel this way.
I don’t have to explain this ache in my spirit.
Because Jesus sees me, too.
He sees what’s buried in my silence.
And He knows how to touch what I didn’t even ask to be healed.

Maybe I’m not lost.
Maybe I’m just being seen.

And maybe… the mud is already on my eyes.

Yes, absolutely.

Jesus’ timing was everything in that passage.

He wasn’t reacting... He was revealing.
At the exact moment when everyone else saw a man with a lifelong problem, Jesus saw a man positioned for a divine encounter.

And look how quietly it happened—
No announcement.
No altar call.
No deep prayer.

Just presence… and purpose.

Sometimes we feel the ache long before we see the reason. But John 9 reminds us:
God's timing doesn't need our understanding—just our obedience.

Even in the moments we don’t cry out, He still stops.
Even when we can’t see,

He’s already working with the mud and the mercy.

"Even when you don’t ask, He still sees. Even when you feel nothing, healing may already be on its way."